Secrets
by tomblily
Summary: Some secrets, when let out, can cause much trouble for those involved. Especially this one." Lucretia's infatuation with her Potions Professor is driving her mad. But not as much as the possibility she may never see him again. Does he feel the same way?
1. Twisted Faith

Secrets

By Lucretia Nightshade

"I have some secrets of my own

I wonder if you do

don't keep them all to yourself

your secrets trouble you..."

"_Secrets" _Strawberry Switchblade

Many a night Lucretia would lay awake in the girls' Ravenclaw dormitory, countless thoughts racing 'round her head.

What will happen tomorrow? Why are the history books so biased? Does Harry wear boxers or briefs? What is non-dairy creamer made of, if it's not dairy? Will Professor Snape ever find out...?

A knot tightened in her stomach whenever he came to her mind. The first time she saw him, she was quite intimidated, along with most of the other students. Rightly so, as he enjoyed taking points from other houses at any and every occasion. He also enjoyed making you look like a fool. And screaming in your face. And giving detentions...

Detentions? What were those like? She had never received a detention before, as she was somewhat of a goody-two-shoes. More like "goody-one-shoe" she would say, because she was usually reasonable and polite, but could be wicked and vicious if she wanted to.

There were also things she couldn't do; like keeping secrets. Their wretched fingers pulled at her heart, raised a tempest in her mind, and poisoned every fabric of her being until she eventually burst. She felt like a Pandora's Box of sorts. Some secrets, when let out, can cause much trouble for those involved. Especially this one.

She had fallen for him. Hard. She didn't fully understand it, but she knew the feeling pulsed through her blood each day. If she ever told her friends, they would never let her live it down. She knew she could trust them with most things, but this was far too much; too intense and personal. But every day she saw him. She saw him in class, passed him in the halls, and sometimes even searched for him, hoping to catch a glimpse of the object of her affections. Infatuations. Desires. Obsessions. Every day there was a chance: a chance to see him, a chance to tell him... She wouldn't dare. She couldn't even bring herself to imagine the punishments that would await her if she let the secret slip out. But it _had_ to come out, and soon.

An unusual feeling took her over this morning as she dressed. _Will it be today?_ The black unmentionables, the uniform, the shoes, the jewelry, and makeup all followed suit, same as the days before. _Maybe? Maybe not..._She threw her leather book bag over her shoulder and walked out to the great hall for breakfast. _I guess I'll find out soon enough..._

"Lucretia Hiiiii!" she heard the familiar squealing from the Gryffindor table as her long-time friend Sicilia Fawn skipped up to her. Suddenly captured in an embrace, she began to snap out of her usual morning grogginess. "Hello Sicilia," she replied sleepily.

"Just saying good morning to you, I gotta go finish some stupid homework I didn't do... see you later!" Sicilia said, bouncing off with her friends. Lucretia sat down carefully at the Ravenclaw table as usual, starting on some toast.

She glanced around, and eventually her eyes fell upon none other than Professor Snape. She thought he looked quite enticing today, moping and grumbling over the Daily Prophet, trying to avoid conversation with everyone else. She recalled the time last year when she had sent him an anonymous love letter on Valentine's Day. He seemed a little bit surprised when he opened the hot pink, perfumed envelope, filled with prose of her passions for him. His frown turned to a look of disgust, then he rolled his eyes, and cast the letter into the fire, obviously dismissing it as some sarcastic joke. Her heart sunk as she watched his reaction, but it was what she should have expected from the impenetrable Potions Master.

That was the only thing you could count on from him: grumpiness. Aside from his cruel demeanor, the suspense he left most people in was frightening enough on its own. Especially to her. She had been worrying a lot after overhearing something about Snape being a spy for Dumbledore to keep an eye on Voldemort. Everyone knew how powerful and merciless the dark lord was, and if he ever found out Snape's secret... the fate that would befall him was sure to be terrible. She might never see him again. One day, he could be gone forever, and she'd never have a chance to tell him. If she missed the opportunity to touch him, to be close to him... she would never forgive herself.

Severus glanced at the clock on the wall of the dank and drafty dungeon. Yet another potions class would be starting soon. Those bratty children never ceased to annoy him, with their lack of respect and discipline. There were a few who stood out among the others, Potter he especially loathed. Granger was quite the insufferable know-it-all, as he had once called her. Longbottom was utterly pathetic and hopeless. Morrigan stood out too, sort of like a sore thumb. She was as odd as Lovegood, if not more so. She was not very popular, as he had heard from other students, and seemed to know more about potion ingredients and dark arts than anyone else in her class. Quite impressive for a 6th year, he thought.

She reminded him a little of himself when he was a teenager, which made him feel somewhat sympathetic to her. He also thought she was quite a beautiful young lady, with long raven hair, large eyes, and such pale skin... "How would it feel to touch such soft, delicious flesh?" Blood began rushing down between his legs, causing a familiar swelling...---wait... this was a _student_ he was thinking of! "Don't be so stupid, she is only a young girl!" he thought to himself. "But she looks like a young woman, and she is so _mature_ for her age..." His thoughts argued amongst each other, but soon he came to his senses, as the students would be pouring into the classroom at any moment. He sat down at his desk, covering his obvious bulge with his robes. Hastily trying to will his arousal away, he pretended to grade papers.


	2. Crimes of Opportunity

The morning came and went, and it was now lunchtime. It was a sunny autumn day, so Sicilia insisted on dragging Lucretia outside for a bit of a picnic. They sat beneath a large and twisting oak tree, its leaves as bright as the scarlet and gold stripes on Sicilia's tie. Maelstrom circled overhead and then flew down to join them. The large, stately raven hobbled over to Lucretia, croaking his usual "Never!" His black eye and his golden eye gazed up her longingly as she asked him, "Is that all you have to say?"

"Never!" he replied, nipping affectionately at her knee, demanding a piece of bread. Sicilia was chattering to Wystaer Shindou, a Slytherin girl, and asking seemingly endless questions about Draco Malfoy. Wystaer was a very clever girl, and didn't always follow the rules, which made her a good fit for her house. Unlike what most Slytherins (supposedly) were, she was actually a very sweet and nice person... to her friends, that is. She would do anything she could do to help them.

Lucretia wasn't really listening to them, as she was too immersed in her own thoughts:

If I were decapitated, would I be me in my head, or me in my body? What right does my head have to call itself me?

But she never reached the answer, as she was startled back to reality by the mention of her name.

"You're coming with me aren't you, Lucretia?" Sicilia pleaded.

"What?" asked Lucretia.

"To the Slytherin boys' dormitories! I want to sneak in to see Draco, maybe he will dream of me...if I use this spell I found..."

"Are you crazy?! You can't do that!"

"Oh yes I can, Wystaer told me the password and directions and everything!"

"I don't think that's a very smart idea..."

"Come on, it'll be so great!"

"What do I have to do with it?"

"To keep lookout, of course."

"Uh..."

"Wystaer is going to cause a distraction so no one left in the common room will see us, then we'll sneak in, and you'll let me know if anyone's coming!"

I was 10:45, and most of the students at Hogwarts were fast asleep. Not these three, though.

Wystaer had recently acquired some dungbombs on a trip to Hogsmeade, and had been saving them for a special occasion. The cold, dark halls were mercifully empty. It was now or never. When she set them off, Sicilia and Lucretia would make their move.

_**BOOM!**_

The signal went off, and the remaining stragglers in the Slytherin common room ran down the hall and around the opposite corridor of where Lucretia and Sicilia were waiting hidden to see what was going on. In the mass confusion, Lucretia and Sicilia easily slipped into the Slytherin common room, using the rather intriguing password "Carpe Noctem". Lucretia's suggestion to put a silencing charm on the door of the dormitories had worked well. Apparently none of them had heard a thing. "Shoot some red sparks under the door if anyone comes, then I will hide!" Sicilia whispered, carefully creeping into the boys' room. Lucretia nodded silently and tried her best to blend in with the shadows.

Several minutes passed, she hoped Sicilia would be done soon. She became more and more anxious as the minutes slipped away. She heard swift footsteps fast approaching the common room door. She quickly sent the sparks beneath the door, praying that her friend had received the warning. Once again trying to be invisible in the darkness, the common room door opened with a loud creak. But the figure who appeared in the doorway wasn't their friend Wystaer, it was Professor Snape. The look on his face was one of total fury, and he scanned the room with the end of his wand lit. To her horror, he stormed up the stairs toward the dormitory door, his boots falling heavy on every step. Her heart jumped in her chest harder with every inch closer he approached. Determined to find the culprit who set off the bombs, he cast his light down the hall toward the dormitories. His lumos spell was powerful, and not one nook or cranny wasn't drowned in the intense light.

SHIT.

He spotted her cowering in a corner, shaking with fear.

"WHAT in Merlin's name are you doing down here?" he demanded. She could do nothing but stare. Then he realized exactly whom he was yelling at. His black eyes seemed to burn straight into her soul. "Miss Morrigan...I must say I am quite disappointed with you." His voice was dangerously soft. "Sneaking around in places you don't belong? In the middle of the night? 20 points from Ravenclaw. I'll see you in detention tomorrow, be in my office at eight o'clock," he said coldly. She was too afraid to make a move. "Get back to your dormitory! NOW!"


	3. Questions Without Answers

Unfortunately, today Lucretia had potions as one of her classes. The whole time was agonizing; she could barely concentrate on what she was supposed to be doing.

Add toe of frog... then wait for it to come to a boil... 

Professor Snape was busy yelling at Justin Finch-Fletchly for adding the powdered cat's claw too early. She couldn't help but stare at him, his black robes billowing behind him as he strode over to get into Justin's face.

He's so sexy when he's angry... 

"Miss Morrigan why aren't you working?" he snapped at her when he felt her eyes upon him. She blushed a bright pink and continued working.

After countless painful minutes class was finally over. She amazingly had successfully concocted the potion correctly, as evidenced by the fact it glowed a deep blue color. She took a longer time than everyone else to clean up, to make sure she did everything right. Irritating Snape further was the last thing she needed right now. His glance caught her as she made her way out of the classroom, and there was something... different in his eyes.

Nearing the door, she noticed their usual icy stare was gone, and was replaced with something else she couldn't quite figure out. Either startled or distracted, or both, she dropped her books all over the floor. She blushed and bent down to pick them up, forgetting that her skirt would sometimes blow upwards, exposing her backside if she wasn't careful. He noticed this and suddenly started to feel his temperature rise... but to his subconscious slight disappointment, she scrambled out of the dungeon as fast as her legs could carry her.

At dinnertime she had found out that Wystaer blamed the explosion in the hall on Peeves the poltergeist. Filch, the school caretaker, had gladly accepted her excuse. He was constantly looking for a reason to convince the headmaster that that blasted ghost was nothing but trouble, hopefully ridding the castle of that annoyance. Sicilia had been hiding under a bed until all the fuss died down, and slipped away undetected. Lucretia had other things to worry about: her detention was in 3 minutes.

She hurried down to the dungeons where Snape's office was, begging the gods she wouldn't be late. It was bad enough she had been out of bed late at night; she didn't need to be tardy on top of that. She knocked softly on his door. "Enter," she heard his velvet voice reply from within. The door opened with a groan, and she stepped inside, standing with her feet slightly pointed toward each other. The door swung closed on its own, and he didn't even look up from the parchment he was writing on. "Um...Professor?" she said quietly to let him know she was still there. He looked up from his work for a moment and said, "Now... you will be dusting and arranging the potion ingredients and books on my shelves, in alphabetical order. And if I discover ANY amount of my ingredients missing, I will be sure that you are promptly suspended."

He went back to his work for a while, but it was difficult to keep his mind on the tasks at hand. He couldn't stop remembering the dream he had the night before. Unlike the nightly torments of flashbacks to his school years and torture at the hands of Voldemort, this dream had been different. Very different. Strange, exciting, and even pleasant, but most of all confusing. Red marks streaked across white skin, tangles of black hair, ruby red lips, sighs of ecstasy and waves of intense pleasure. Somebody screaming his name; someone who loved him? Who could possibly love mean, greasy, old, slimy Snape? He awoke feeling more satisfied than he had felt in a long time.

He was fighting a personal war of morals and emotion in his mind. He couldn't have such thoughts about this girl. It was totally inappropriate! She was his student, and he was her professor. Nothing more. Right?

"Sir?" her shy voice tore him from his mental maelstrom. "What?" he snapped back, sounding angrier than he meant to. "There's something I need to tell you..." she said, slowly approaching his desk. "Yes?" he asked coolly. "Um.... I just wanted to say that I... I really... like you. I mean—I admire you... a lot," she managed to get out. Disgusted, he raised his eyebrow in that very Snape-like manner and said, "This is not amusing! Get back to work," he said. She blushed and turned away to continue her work.

"_Surely this has to be some joke. I'll bet Potter or her stupid friends put her up to this. I thought she would have a better mind on her not to fool around with and disrespect her superiors."_ He thought to himself. Her expression had been one of disappointment rather than amusement when she witnessed his reaction, though. _"Was there a chance she had meant what she said? No. Don't be so stupid!"_

While Snape was speculating, Lucretia was plotting and scheming in her head:

I need him to notice me... maybe if I get myself hurt? That always seems to work in the movies. Yes, then he would have to notice, maybe even accompany me to the hospital wing... maybe we'll be close if I'm lucky... well, it's now or never!

_She climbed to the top of the ladder she was using to reach the higher shelves, and "accidentally" lost her footing. She fell to the cold stone floor with a thud, hitting a little harder than she had intended to... _Ouch._ She started to feel a little dizzy..._


	4. Temptation Blossoms

He was lost in his thoughts until he heard something fall. He looked over and saw her lying on the floor, and rushed over to her. He may not have liked his students very much, but he was still responsible for their safety. "What have you done now, stupid girl?" he asked, even though he knew she was far from stupid. Kneeling over her, he discovered she was out cold. He scooped her up into his arms and carried her over to lie on the nearest surface, his desk.

Lucretia awoke from the blackness to see nothing but a dark blurry figure over her and fuzzy golden lights in the background. She felt a cool cloth gently stroking her brow as things became clearer. "Are you alright?" Snape asked quietly. "I... think so..." she replied with some difficulty. His other hand rested on her shoulder. "Oh my god, oh my god, he's touching me!" Her mind screamed. She had never seen him so... not angry. She thought she could see a hint of concern in his obsidian eyes. He was just a few inches away... she could even smell him. He smelled like sandalwood and a million ancient books, with a hint of clove.

She was so close... the awkward silence was unnecessary, but neither of them seemed to want it to end. He couldn't help gazing into her eyes, which were a pale greenish gray, her thick lashes lined in black. He could just barely feel her trembling.

Willing herself to be bold, she leaned in, hoping to steal a kiss. To Snape's surprise, their lips met, and hers tasted as lovely as he had imagined. He was tense for a moment from the shock, but then she felt him returning the kiss. She couldn't believe this was happening. It was too good to be real!

As suddenly as it had started, he pulled away, expecting to be slapped across the face. "I... I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me..." he apologized, a hint of terror in his shaking voice. "Please don't be sorry," she said. "What?" he asked, taken aback. "It's okay... I... I love you," she blurted out. This couldn't be real. "No... you don't know what you are saying, you are only a child. I'm sorry. I assure you I will never let this happen again. You may leave now, detention is over," he said.

"No..." she said. "I said get out," he replied sounding dangerous. "No, I want to stay... with you!" she begged softly, grabbing fistfuls of his robes. "We can't do this," he protested, yet kissing her pouty red lips again. "Why not?" she asked after a long moment of his lips possessing hers. "Because it's not appropriate... it's just insane," he said, rubbing her arms and shoulders. "Sanity is over-rated," she said, as if that settled the matter, and kissed him again.

Lust overtook him, and he licked hungrily at her lips. She parted her lips for him, and his tongue slid inside to taste every part of her sweet mouth, as she gathered enough courage to explore his as well. Her hand moved up to touch his neck, and his inky black hair tickled her. She ran her fingers through it gently, finding it wasn't greasy at all, just incredibly silky.

This drove him wild. No one had ever touched his hair before... or him, at least not in that way. He never dreamed this would really happen, that he would have her, willing and laid out before him. Her young flesh beckoned to him. Breaking the intense kiss, he moved downward to kiss and bite at her neck, ignoring the spiked leather collar she always wore. Maybe he liked it, in some twisted way? His hand slid down to caress her thighs. Sinfully soft...he grabbed and clawed possessively at her skin, leaving bright red marks. She moaned at the delicious pain...there would definitely be bruising tomorrow.

_Her response shook him back to his logical mind. "Lucretia, we have to stop... we can't do this," he said, sounding disappointed. It felt strange and intimate to hear him addressing her by her first name. "We can," she said, "Please sir, I promise won't tell..."_


	5. The Devil's Cherries

He silenced her with kisses, as his hands reached up to touch her breasts. They were just a little more than handfuls for him, quite large for a girl her age. But age didn't seem to matter much anymore, as their passions proved. She turned to face him, her legs now at his sides, straddling him. She could feel his erection through his trousers, pressing insistently against her thighs. It was quite impressive, especially for a man well beyond his teenage years. This frightened her slightly, she didn't quite know why it did, but it caused a rush of arousal to dampen her panties. Her fright soon disappeared as he kissed her softly and gently now, teasing her while he loosened her tie and unbuttoned her blouse.

"How long," he panted between kisses, "How long have you... felt this way?" "Since third year," she said, with longing in her eyes. "And I never knew..." he cursed himself.

But he knew now, and that was all that mattered. He took off her shoes and socks, removing the not-so-important articles just to tease, before sliding off her skirt and unhooking her bra. Licking and sucking along her white flesh, he devoured her. He teased her pink nipples ever so lightly with his tongue, forcing a gasp to escape from her mouth. Never before had he seen a sight so beautiful.

His hand slithered down into her panties, and he was surprised at how wet and ready she was. She blushed deeply and whimpered as his fingers stroked across her folds, more firmly each time. When he found her clit, she cried out, "Ohhh, professor!" He smirked, amused that she kept such formality, and he rubbed it in soft circles.

She closed her eyes tightly, expecting to wake up any minute from this dream come true. She opened them again when she heard a rustling sound; he was slipping out of his robes, one button at a time exposing more of his creamy alabaster skin. Nearly panting with excitement, she saw a fine trail of dark hair leading from his navel and disappearing into his pants, which he slipped off with his underwear, in one swift movement.

She had wondered what wizard men traditionally wore underneath, and here was her answer: not much. God, he was gorgeous; slim and slightly toned, several scars gracing his sallow flesh. She licked her lips, her appetite wetted by the sight of his hard cock.

"Tell me," he asked, in that usual silky tone of voice, "Have you done this before?" He decided to ask just in case, even though he wanted to take her right then and there. Slight panic began to fill her; what if he preferred more experienced girls? "No sir, I haven't...is that alright?" He was tense for a moment, "You're a...v-virgin?" She nodded lightly and bit down on her lower lip. "Oh Merlin help me..." he whispered to no one in particular, and ravished her with his mouth and hands once more. He finally reached her panties, and slowly slid them off her shapely legs, discovering only lush smoothness beneath.

A moan escaped her when his tongue dragged across her nether lips, darting deep inside to taste her. "How could this possibly be any better?" she asked herself, "Oh, I know..." When he came up to suck and bite her nipples, she reached down and gently stroked him. "Don't..." His expression darkened with lust, "If you keep doing that you'll get more than you bargained for," he warned, as if that were going to deter her. She didn't let go.

"...Very well, then," he said, "you're sure... you want this?" "I've never... been more sure... of anything... in my life, sir," she replied breathlessly. "Please, take me..." He let out a low growl at her words, and she had never before heard any sound as erotic. Feeling him pressed hard against her entrance, she braced herself. He slowly slid into her, amazed at how tight and slippery she was. Gently he began to pump in and out, delving deeper each time.

She couldn't believe this, even though the slight sting when he first entered her proved it was real. She never thought the potions master would be kissing her, loving her, inside of her. His fingers stroked and played with her slit, while he kissed and worshipped every inch of her body. He felt so elated about their joining, and how she whimpered and moaned at every inward thrust. She moaned louder when she felt herself starting to approach orgasm, "Oooh sir it feels ssssso good..." she hissed.

"Please, call me Severus, my sweet," he breathed into her ear, just barely a whisper. She squirmed and thrust her hips back against him as she got closer. "Oooh god, oh god, ohhhh SEVERUS!" She screamed his name as she rode out an incredible orgasm, her walls clamping tightly around his throbbing cock. Her sudden tightness and rush of wetness, her moaning out his name, truly enjoying herself, sent him over the edge. As she grabbed his arse to pull him deeper inside, he thrust in hard, moaning and panting with each jet of his orgasm that he poured into her.

They lay there, spent for a few moments to catch their breath, him resting on his elbows so he wouldn't crush her with his weight. "I really do love you..." she said. He stared at her, before admitting to her and mostly to himself, "I love you too..."


	6. Dragons To Be Slain

A white candle burned low in its lantern, casting shadows that flickered across the room. Demons danced with beasts across the walls, slithered down to the floor, then began their twisted waltz once more. In a chair near the fireplace, which now contained only dying embers, sat a weary figure. Severus was exhausted from the night's events, but mostly from attempting to sort things out. He turned his thoughts over and over in his mind so much that they had become just a shapeless, melted mess. He had tried laying in his bed for hours, but cruel and merciless sleep refused to take him.

He had ruined everything; he surely would be sacked if anyone found out what he had done. He feared that he would be killed by Voldemort and his remaining death eaters, or sent back to Azkaban Prison. He had heard of many a wizard driven to madness there, and due to his previous encounter with a dementor, he believed it. Just the torment of one of them had been enough of a taste for him; he knew he never wanted to end up there. If his secret got out, it would be all over. But somehow he didn't care; somehow he thought it had all been worth it.

Lucretia tossed and turned in her bed all night long. Sleep was a far-away goal; she couldn't clear her mind. She begged to stay with him, but he refused, telling her it would be too suspicious for her bed to be found empty. When morning finally dawned, she pulled the dark blue velvet covers over her head, groaning with disappointment. She was in no mood for classes at the moment.

Her body ached dully, and remembering her scratches and bruises, she grinned inwardly. She dressed hastily after a quick shower, sliding her tie around her neck and pulling it snug; she hadn't bothered to undo it the night before. She left her shirt untucked, peeking out from under her sweater-vest. Slipping on her robes and grabbing her bag, she staggered out of the door, not bothering to say a word to her dorm-mates.

Thankfully, there was still some time left for breakfast. She sat at her house table and glanced around the great hall for Sicilia. She saw her just bouncing in; and also that Professor Snape was nowhere to be seen. Sicilia bounded over and sat down at the now mostly empty Ravenclaw table beside her friend.

She wrapped an arm around Lucretia and exclaimed cheerfully, "What a beautiful day!"

"Yes, indeed," Lucretia replied.

"I feel so great today. How about you?" she asked.

"I'm alright," said Lucretia, staring into her own space.

Sicilia noticed a faint crimson scrape on her leg, peeking out from beneath her skirt. "What's that?" She lifted it up in curiosity before she could answer. Just leave it to her friends to be touchy-feely at all the wrong moments.

"Lucretia what the hell happened to you!" she nearly shrieked in horror.

"Shhh!" Lucretia hissed, "It's nothing, it's okay."

"How could it be okay? It looks like it really hurts! Did Snape do this to you?! I'll fucking kill him if he even—"Sicilia retaliated, sounding utterly enraged, but Lucretia cut her off. "I just... had to... scrub cauldrons... I fell... it's hard to do, you know?" She lied.

Sicilia looked at her, her face screwed up in an attempt to piece it all together, and said reluctantly, "Okay... but if you wanna talk to me about anything you can." Lucretia nodded, and they parted ways to attend their first classes of the morning.


	7. Shadows Within Mirrors

Sitting in the stuffy, boring atmosphere of Professor Binn's classroom, she decided to let her mind wander rather than listen to him ramble on and on about the goblin revolts of 1672.

She still remembered when she first received her letter from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Her and her parents were very surprised, because there had never before been a witch or wizard in their family. At least, that's what they assumed. They could trace their ancestry back only nine generations; all other records were lots in her families' immigrations and marriages.

The parents she lived with were much older than most. By this, they had a lot more experience in life, which came in handy when she needed to ask for advice from them. She was lucky that they completely accepted her. She got away with almost anything. They loved her and spoiled her to death, not realizing that they couldn't keep this up forever. She would eventually have to learn to live and succeed on her own.

Her father was a skilled mechanic and electrician, with a brilliant mind and a sweet disposition. When Lucretia was 8 years old, he invented a device that revolutionized the computer industry. Her family because quite wealthy and they moved to a large mansion in England to be close to his side of the family.

Her mother had a much smaller family, and was born in America, unlike her father. She had been quite the hippie back in the 1960's and was a very open and liberal person. She always wanted the best for her daughter, as she never got even close to the best in her childhood.

Lucretia had always been very sensual and creative, and he parents nourished that quality by enrolling her in art classes and cello lessons. Her work was hard to look at and understand for most; she seemed to be the only one who "got" it. She felt that way about many other things, too. One of her biggest pet peeves was always stupid, incompetent people. But, much to her dismay, she always seemed to run into folks like that.

She studied the dark arts in her spare time, in case she would ever need it. Or perhaps she was just fascinated by it. She reveled in any knowledge she could get her hands on, but things dark and forbidden most often caught her attention. Could this be a reason why she fancied the potions master so much? And where was he, was he alright? Her mind wandered toward him again; her heart caught in her throat. Maybe being distracted with something else would be a better idea...

Twirling her wand around in her fingers, she looked back on the day she had bought it. It was an odd combination indeed: Ebony and Augurey feather, 13 inches, strong. When she gave it a wave, quite tired of trying many others before, it accepted her quite well. To her surprise, but mostly the shopkeeper's, she had accidentally singed off the wandmaker's eyebrows!

_She could faintly hear Binn's monotone voice droning, and classmates snoring softly in the background. Susan Bones was drooling on her desk while Cho Chang scribbled what looked suspiciously like a love note onto a sheet of lavender parchment. _Did Snape ever write love notes?_ She sighed in defeat and tried desperately to listen to the teacher's lecture._


	8. My Soul To Hell For Company

Autumn fell and the days grew colder. The winter nights were darker and longer than they had ever seemed before.

Lucretia decided to try something new: staying at Hogwarts for the Christmas Holiday. She knew she would miss her family, but something inside told her to stay. There was a reason, but she didn't quite understand what it was specifically. The romance with her teacher continued, even growing stronger. She thanked the gods for her dear friend Sicilia and her awful ideas.

She was also grateful that no one had a clue what was really going on. Often they drowned their sorrows in the pleasures of each other. Sometimes Severus would wince and grab his left arm, as if something hurt him. She would always ask what was the matter, but he didn't want to tell her what it was or why. Today she would sneak down to the potions master's chambers, to keep him company.

Severus sat in his favorite chair by the fire, while his young lover lay face-up across his large silk-draped bed, her hair cascading over the side.

"I'm so bored today," she said absently.

"Well, it's not my fault you made the decision to stay here over holiday," Snape replied back, slightly annoyed.

"How are you so sure?" she asked, a wicked smile creeping over her face.

He frowned and returned to reading something about the 1001 uses of toad's warts.

"I want to go out," she said quite matter-of-factly.

He didn't look up.

"Please take me somewhere," she pleaded, turning over onto her front side.

He cast a fleeting glance at her as if to say, "you're kidding, right?"

"We should go to Hogsmeade, it would be so much fun," she reasoned.

He stared.

"Come on..."

He continued.

"You need to learn how to have some fun once in a while, you know..."

She pulled the pouty-sad-face out; it worked almost every time on him, despite how he would deny it did. "Pleeeeeeeeeeeease?"

He smiled faintly and sighed. "Fine."

Hogsmeade was lovely; all the shops dusted with a shimmering blanket of pure white snow. There were many Christmas shoppers milling about, so Lucretia and her companion went mostly unnoticed. Much to Severus' dismay, Lucretia had begged him to go into Honeyduke's to satisfy her urges for sugar. He regretted this immediately; she was as high as a kite, clinging to him and giggling. Her curiosity had led them into a shop in the dodgy section of Hogsmeade that sold what looked suspiciously like dark magic items.

"Wow," Lucretia exclaimed, her eyes wide in amazement, "come look at this!"

She pointed to a small and ancient looking kelpie skull. "It's so beautiful..."

"Perhaps we should leave now, I have all that I need..." Severus grabbed her hand.

"I wonder how old it is..." she said, reaching out to stroke it.

_The moment her fingers touched it, Severus felt the familiar pulling sensation of travel by portkey_


	9. The Killing Game

"What's going on?" Lucretia asked anxiously.

"I don't know..." he said honestly.

"I'm sorry!..." she moaned, disgusted with her carelessness.

"Shhhh..."

They had landed in a dark, cold room. They could have been miles away from Hogsmeade by now.

Laughter could be heard faintly in the distance. Another noise whispered through the halls that Lucretia couldn't quite make out. All she knew was that she didn't like it much.

He stood up then helped Lucretia up from the hard, musty carpeted floor. He gestured for her to stay close, but she did anyway out of fear.

As they carefully crept down the halls, another sound joined the mysterious chorus of maniacal amusement. She could hear a strangled groaning, barely forced out of the speaker's throat.

The laughter intensified, growing colder and more vicious with each breath.

Ever so quietly, she could hear what sounded like soft, wet things falling to a tiled floor.

"These muggle devices sure are silly-looking, but at least they're good for something!" a man's voice said.

They turned the corner slowly, and what Lucretia saw nearly made her insides turn themselves inside-out.

A dismembered man sat tied to a chair in the kitchen. Two figures in long, black cloaks stood beside him, one of them holding a metal vegetable peeler. Most of the man's face was stripped of his skin, and his clothing was stained with his own blood. Worse than the limbs and pieces of flesh littering the floor, she could see parts of his skull peeking through the bloody mess that was his mutilated visage. She clasped her hand to her mouth in attempt to stifle a scream.

The figures turned to see what had made the muffled shriek. Their faces were disguised by plain white masks with narrow slits for eyes.

"Ahh, Severus! Come to join the party, eh?" One of them said, sounding rather delightfully surprised. "And I see you've brought a little mudblood with you." The figure approached her, looking her up and down. "Very nice...so young and delicious. You sure know how to pick them, old chap! Shall we have ourselves a bit of fun right now or--?"

"What sick thing are you trying to do now?" Severus asked, his voice slightly trembling.

"You would know all about what sick is, now wouldn't you?" The other man said chuckling. "Don't think that we all have forgotten—"

"SHUT UP!!" Severus shouted, completely enraged. She had never seen him blush before now.

What was left of the poor muggle's eyelid twitched spasmodically.

"What's wrong with you?!" the masked man demanded, "You've been acting odd lately... more than usual. Our lord is starting to become suspicious."

Severus pulled his wand out of his robes, and pushed Lucretia behind him.

They laughed. "Going to curse us?" one of them asked, "Bring it on, then! Let's see what tricks you've got."

"Go! Now! Whatever you hear, keep away!" he whispered to her quickly. She ran.

"Oh no you don't!" the cloaked man laughed as serpent-like ropes shot out of his wand, wrapping around her tightly.

Severus bared his teeth in rage, and pointed his wand at the man. She was shocked to hear what he intended to do next.

"Avada Ke—"

"Expelliarmus!!" the other man shouted, making Severus' wand fly out of his grasp. "You lousy, sneaking coward...Crucio!"

He collapsed the floor, groaning and writhing in agony. She shut her eyes; she couldn't bear to watch.

The men, who she inferred were death eaters, cackled madly at his torment.

If she could only reach her wand... it was just inches away, tucked into her cloak. Thankfully, she had been tied up a few times before, and had some vague ideas about how to regain use of some limbs. She twisted desperately, while trying hard not to be noticed. She could just feel the tip of it... she squeezed and pulled at the pocket until it began to slip out. Nearly dislocating her other arm, she just managed to unsheathe it.

Blood trickled from Severus' mouth as the men continued to be entertained.

Great. She dropped it. If she pinched her fingers together she could make it... but carefully, or it would roll out of reach... almost... yes! She got it. She shrugged her cloak out of the way, aimed the best she could, and shouted, "Expelliarmus!"

Severus lay still, panting, blood weeping silently from his fresh wounds.

"YOU LITTLE CUNT!" the death eater yelled, tearing off his mask and dashing toward her. His icy fingers crushed around her throat, choking her. "This was it. Over," She realized, "I'm going to end up like that carcass in the chair... he's going to join me in death..." Hot tears ran down her cheeks as her surroundings began to turn black.

Through her dying fog, she could see the other man yelling insults and kicking Severus' ribs. She could see her killer's face. He grimaced and hissed, and surprisingly, let go of her.

"Damnit! Right when we were starting to have some fun..." the man who was beating him swore. The death eaters glanced at each other, then disappeared with loud cracks.


	10. Beneath The Howling Stars

It had taken quite a few tries of different spells and charms to release her from the ropes. She had burned several holes through her cloak in the struggle. Thankfully, those particular death eaters were too thick to consider that she might be armed. She sighed in relief; he was still breathing...barely, but still breathing nonetheless.

The muggle, on the other hand, was slumped over in the chair, held up only by the ropes that tied him to it. She figured he was dead... she didn't have the courage to check, and she had to think of something to help Professor Snape--and quickly.

Kneeling over him, she tried to wake him. He only let out a quiet moan; that would have to do.

She only knew a few charms to help him. Why didn't I practice more advanced healing spells all with all the attacking ones? She wouldn't be able to handle this anyhow; she was too inexperienced. She needed to get to a hospital... not a muggle hospital. Curse wounds of this magnitude were too much for doctors to handle.

Or she could at least find another wizard nearby? How would she take him with her? Surely he couldn't walk. She could use the mobilicorpus spell to carry him along... no, she couldn't afford the risk of muggles seeing an obviously unconscious man levitating behind her. No, there was no time.

Maybe she could find an owl or some other bird to deliver a message to Dumbledore? No, she didn't want Snape in any more trouble. St. Mungo's? Yes... but it would take far too long.

She looked out the window, desperately searching for a solution. The naked trees swayed in the bitter winter wind, and night was falling at a rapid pace. Barren limbs scraped against the window, the wind howling past them.

That's it!

The Ravenclaw spirit in her had inspired her to discover new magic. She had been practicing incantations, and nurturing her kinship with trees. If she concentrated hard, and wanted it to happen enough, the targeted tree would awaken and move according to her will. This spell had only worked on small seedlings so far, but she had faith. She knew her need would bring her great power. The only problem was, this spell would only last for a while, depending on the size and health of the one she cast it upon. This was her last resort; she had to try.

Dragging him and her book bag outside with her, she searched the house's yard for the largest tree. Why were there so many fir trees when she didn't need them? Far off, perhaps 50 yards away, she spotted a large, goblet-shaped elm tree. She wasn't very strong, and a full gown man was not an easy thing to carry. After what seemed like an eternity, she reached it. She pointed her wand toward the roots and spoke, "Arboreus Exceocitum!"

A low rumbling sound could be heard, and the earth began to shake. The tree groaned and creaked loudly as its branches began to move. She quickly slipped off her glove and gently stroked the rough bark of the trunk. "Flexus," she asked, and the tree slowly bent down. She lifted Snape onto it, keeping him supported between the thickest branches. Quickly she climbed on, scraping her knees and tearing her dress in the process.

The sky was turning a darker gray. "Momenixus!" she commanded, and the tree pulled its roots from the snow covered ground. As she patted the limbs of the mighty elm reassuringly, it carried them off along the nearby dirt road.

Nearly an hour had past since they had arrived in the house, and she guess that they were about 10 miles away from it by now. For such large, heavy life-forms, trees traveled quite well. The sky hung over them like deep blue cloak, with twinkling stars scattered across it, reaching far and wide. Breathing in the fresh night air, she saw the headlights of a car up ahead.

"Strigo!" she shrieked. The tree came to an abrupt halt, nearly throwing them off with the force of inertia.

The car reached them, and the window rolled down to reveal a pudgy woman with bags under her eyes. "Can I be of any assistance?" She called out sweetly.

Lucretia tried to make them look inconspicuous. "Uhhh... it's... my uncle. He's... an alcoholic. Yes...that's it," she replied nervously.

"Do you need help, dear?" the woman asked.

"No, thank you... I can handle it."

"Okay... take care now!" she said, rolled up the window, and sped away.

"That was close," she whispered to herself. Her heart was pounding loudly in her chest. She glanced at Snape, who had finally stopped bleeding, and sighed. "Momenixus," she said, and the tree continued to walk down the road.


	11. The Old Crone's Sorrow

About a quarter of an hour had passed since their near discovery by the muggle woman in the car. Lucretia placed her best healing charms on Severus, and he started coming to.  
  
"Mmmph...no..." he groaned, still half-conscious.  
She took his hand and squeezed it softly, "They're gone... everything will be okay."  
"Hmm?... oh...." he said, finally realizing that time had past since all went black.  
  
Suddenly, the tree carrying them began to slow. It groaned weakly and started to topple over. Lucretia screamed as she flew off and landed on the ground. Her fall was mostly broken by the already-battered-enough Snape. "Sorry! Are you alright?" she asked. He nodded.  
  
She helped him to his feet, and let him lean on her as they entered the thick evergreen forest up ahead.  
  
One of the side-affects of this spell was that the tree used would inevitably expire. For this reason, it was best to use it only in a dire emergency. Unfortunately, this was one of those times. But alas, there were no suitable trees standing nearby. They were now several yards within the dark forest, their path lit by the waning moon.  
  
Lucretia looked around for the best direction to go. "Quite a... mess you've gotten us into,... isn't it Miss Morrigan?" Snape said, still attempting to keep his cool, in-control demeanor. She blushed and glared at him then looked towards the sky in search of Proxima Centauri (The North Star), to find out where they were.  
  
A rustling sound of twigs snapping came from the nearby thicket of shrubbery. Not being known for courage, Lucretia gasped and clung to him. He lit the end of his wand and began scanning the area. "Honestly, you silly girl... It's likely only some sort of—"  
  
"Lost, are you, my dears?" a cracking voice drawled from behind. They turned to see an old, wrinkled woman, with crooked yellow teeth and several large, hairy warts on her chin illuminated in the glow emitting from Severus' wand. "What—um, who are you?" Lucretia asked nervously. The woman said calmly, "Never mind that... what are you doing here?"  
  
Lucretia was silent for a moment, considering the smartest thing to say. "Can you help us?" she asked. "I would be glad to, child! Just follow me..." The old woman turned and gestured with her long bony finger for her to follow. She had not taken but two steps before hissing, "He will stay behind."  
  
"But he's the one who needs help! Please," Lucretia began to cry, "he's been injured by a curse, and—"The woman stopped and stared at him, squinting in the bright light. "Alright then," she said, "Come." And they followed her through the trees into the night.  
  
They reached a crude little hut in a small clearing, the glow of a fire shining through its window. The ugly woman opened the door, which gave a loud creak. She helped Severus limp inside to sit in a chair. "Now," she said, closing the door, "what curse has done this?"  
  
"Cruciatus," he panted; the short walk had exhausted him. "Ahh...I know just the remedy. I'll have this potion ready in a few moments," she said sweetly. Snape watched her every move with great attention. He was suspicious of being poisoned; reasonably so, as this strange woman fit the description of a hag to a tee. She had not attacked them on sight, so maybe she was a rare, helpful kind? Either way, they were desperate for help, and this was very convenient. Perhaps too convenient?  
  
Lucretia noticed that he had not looked at the woman suspiciously yet, so she assumed she was not trying to kill him. He was a potions master of course; he would definitely know a poison in the making when he saw one. The cauldron began to bubble over, and the woman scooped some of the strange, gooey substance into a goblet. "This should help very much... drink up!" she said cheerfully, handing him the concoction.  
  
He swallowed it quickly, but not before inspecting it thoroughly. He grimaced slightly at the taste. Which was not surprising, as she had seen some bat's wings being added earlier. Suddenly he didn't look as pale, and was able to breathe more easily. "Thank you..." he said, standing up again, "We had best be going now."  
  
"Oh but why not stay? It's rather late in the evening... and I was just about to prepare supper," the hag said in that sickly-sweet voice. "We're very sorry...we're on a bit of a schedule," Lucretia apologized. "Please stay, I'd love to have you for dinner," She said, creeping closer to them, "I don't get many visitors often." Snape furrowed his brow in suspicion. "You'll be just right," the hag said, grabbing hold of Lucretia's arm. "Hey! Let go of me!" she shouted.  
  
He grabbed her other arm to pull her away, and made a move to pick up his wand. "Not so fast!" she said, magicking his wand away from him. "You cannot leave without repaying me!" The hag pulled Lucretia out of his grasp; he was still a bit weak. She grabbed a large, rusty butcher knife from the table and held it to Lucretia's throat. "Don't you dare try anything...or else! Leave now!" she yelled at him threateningly. In a fit of sudden brilliance, Lucretia seized the hag's wrists and pulled her arms away to free herself. But she did not let go then; no... she shoved the old hag into the nearby heated oven, and slammed the door shut around her neck.  
  
Snape grabbed his wand while Lucretia stole the hag's broomstick, and they ran outside. The hag was still alive in the oven, screaming, flailing, and cursing. He told her to lead; he was never very skilled at flying. He climbed on after she had mounted, and she attempted to kick off from the ground. "Come on!" she screamed at the mediocre, shabby broom, as if it would be listening. But to her relief it finally did. The moment they had touched off the ground, the hag came barging out of the doorway. Her voice shrill and furious, and face melted off, she feebly tried to chase after them.


	12. Little Black Lies

It was nearly dawn by the time Snape and Lucretia returned to Hogwarts. He had to tell her where to go, as Lucretia had a terrible sense of direction. Also, he had to threaten to strangle some house elves to let them back in and to keep them quiet. They snuck back into their rooms unnoticed, as if nothing out of the ordinary had occurred. Unfortunately, there was no time for them to catch up with sleep. Lucretia chose a bad time to go out: the last day of Christmas holiday.  
  
Carefully cracking open the door to the Ravenclaw girl's dorm, Lucretia could see that everyone was still asleep. She flopped down onto her bed, pulled the hangings closed, and wrote the day's events into her journal. If anyone found this, she would be in big trouble. This is why she put a special charm on it that required a password, only to be accepted if spoken in her voice. Then surely no one would be able to know the many deep musings contained on the pages within.  
  
Rubbing her eyes with her fist like a sleepy child, she looked towards the large grandfather clock on the wall. It was six o' clock. Her dorm mates would be awaking any moment. The clock chimed six times as Lucretia hastily changed into her uniform and slipped her journal back into her bag. She left for the common room to sit and will herself to stay awake  
  
"Luuuuuci? Helloooooo?!" Wystaer whispered, poking Lucretia in the arm. She was fast asleep on her desk, face first in a small puddle of drool now forming. "Huh?" She nearly shrieked aloud. "Oh...sorry."  
"Did you get enough sleep last night?" Wystaer asked looking concerned, then magicked the drool off the desk.  
"No..." she said wearily.  
"Why not?"  
"Um...I just couldn't sleep... I guess."  
"Sure... now tell me the real reason."  
"I think I have insomnia or something..."  
"Okay then..."  
  
Wystaer reluctantly accepted her excuse, even though she had vague feeling that her friend may be lying. Lucretia drifted in and out of sleep for the rest of the History of Magic class. Fervent dreams of pain and death fluttered around her mind, jolting her awake at every stab they took. At the end, which seemed it would never come, Wystaer dragged her down to their last class of the day – potions.  
  
Snape burst through the heavy doors of the dungeon in his usual dramatic fashion. He seemed extra grumpy today when he told everyone to shut up and take notes.  
  
"God! Someone definitely took their bitchy potion today," Lucretia, now wide-awake, whispered to Wystaer. "I know! He can be such a greasy git sometimes..." Wystaer said, just a little too loudly.  
  
Snape turned around quickly, and said, "I do not allow side-conversations in my class! Shouldn't you know this by now?" Wystaer attempted to look innocent. Lucretia giggled under her breath, "Sorry, professor..." He stared at her for what seemed longer than necessary, before turning back to the chalkboard.  
  
Eventually, a very boring potions class ended. Lucretia always took a long time to gather her things and get going. But in this class she always seemed to take her time. "Come on! I'm hungry," Wystaer nagged at her. "Okay, okay, I'm coming," Lucretia said, walking with her friend out the door.  
  
But something caught her arm before she left. "Just a moment, Miss Morrigan..." Snape said in that deep, silky voice. Wystaer looked confusedly at Lucretia, searching for an answer. Lucretia flushed slightly pink and shrugged. Snape glared at Wystaer menacingly. "Oookay...I'll see you at dinner," Wystaer said, taking a hint and walking down the hall.  
  
"Have any _interesting_ conversations lately?" He sneered, pushing her back against the wall.  
"N-no, sir..." she stammered.  
"I'm glad to hear that, but you have been naughty."  
She started to sweat.  
"You know what happens to girls who are naughty, don't you?" He said coolly, pointing toward a wooden meter stick leaning against his desk. She nodded.  
He smirked, "Good. See you in detention." And with that, pushed her out and slammed the door.


	13. Fever Dreams

"What took you so long?" Wystaer asked suspiciously when Lucretia was shoved out the door.

"I got detention..." Lucretia replied quickly.

"Why for? You didn't do anything!" she said angrily. Lucretia fumbled with her thoughts for a moment. She couldn't think of anything.

Wystaer folded her arms and frowned, attempting a terribly unflattering Snape impression, "INSUBORDINATION!"

"Oh god!" Lucretia shrieked, and they burst into laughter as they walked down to the great hall for dinner.

It was normal for students to make fun of Snape behind his back, but it just didn't really feel right anymore. "He's not really that bad you know..." Wystaer said, twirling spaghetti with her fork.

Sicilia looked slightly confused, "Who?"

Wystaer, finishing slurping up her noodles said, "Professor Snape."

"He's so ugly and mean! I don't like him..." Sicilia shuddered.

"I don't think anyone does..." Luna Lovegood cut in.

"How could they? He's too scary."

Lucretia just stared at her silverware, pretending to be amused by the conversation.

"No, he can be a good guy. Like this one time--I was sitting in the common room and he passed through and actually ASKED me why I was there by myself. Isn't that incredible? And THEN he sat down with me and actually TALKED with me for a little bit!" Wystaer said.

Lucretia smiled, then looked around the hall.

Snape sat at the staff table, arguing with McGonnagal over something. Obviously, tempers were quick when one was unrested. She stared for what seemed two seconds in her mind, but it turned out to be two minutes in reality. "Quit staring at me, you freak!" said a Hufflepuff who sat in the direction she was looking. She narrowed her cat-like eyes dangerously. "I wasn't staring at you," She said, and laughed. "What's your problem?" the blonde Hufflepuff boy said, now standing. "You," she sneered, and promptly left for the Ravenclaw common room.

Of course, the Hufflepuff boy followed, with his gang of friends. They were known for their tight-knit family mob tendencies. If you insult one Hufflepuff, you insult them all. She could hear their footsteps. "Leave me alone," she said flatly. They kept moving. Lucretia whipped around to face them, some hair getting caught on her face, "Leave me alone." They moved in closer. A mousy looking girl from the group snarled, "Why don't you go wash your greasy hair or something, dirty goth!" They erupted with laughter. She promptly hexed the girl, leaving her brown hair melting off her head and falling around her shoulders. "At least I have hair," Lucretia said, "maybe next time you'll respect a simple request."

She left them huddling around the crying girl, to sit in the common room. She'd expect yet another detention soon enough.

"What has gotten into me lately?" she wondered to herself. "I seem to be looking for thrills. When will I be satisfied? Will I ever...?"

I sit in the garden, breathing the air, thick with ozone.

Mother left the hedge trimmers on the ground.

She is so beautiful, just like her flowers. I think she'd like one... I pick up the scissors far too large for my hands.

SNAP!

A snow-white rose, the sweetest of all, falls to the soil. I brush off the bumblebee still dying for a taste. I walk across the damp dirt to her, I pull gently on her dress.

"Mother, for you!" I say, presenting my token of appreciation and affection.

She frowns at me. What did I do wrong? Don't you like it? I cut it just for you—ouch. She hit me; I cry. Sent me to bed without supper. Screaming something about ruining her hard work.

My room's nothing special; the furniture is old. Flies buzz on the walls. I squash them with my fingers. Why? I don't know. I don't like them. They laugh at me. Bigger every day.

Father beats me again. I smell the whiskey on his breath. I feel numb this time. I know by now not to let myself weep.

The flies laugh.

STOP!

I've run away. I'm so big now, my legs feel too long. My fingers are sticks. I look into a black stream.

A reflection is there--my father? No, my face. Who am I?

The water ripples like butterflies in summer. The stream swells, a white angel rises; The river her veil. Shades to hide her habits.

Oh, how I long to swim!

Her endless waves, flirting and splashing, swallow me up. I take her inside; my chest is a temple.

I never thought... how lovely it would be... to drown...

Severus awoke from the dream, startled at the sheer bizarre quality. For just a moment it seemed real, but then he remembered he was in his bed. Turning over, he saw Lucretia, soft curves lit by the pale moonlight. He thought she looked so ...cute? dressed in one of his old pinstriped shirts, far too large for her, purring softly in serene sleep. He held her close, like a precious treasure threatened to be taken away. All he had was the present time, as she often said, and he tried his best to make the most of it.


	14. Lord Have Mercy

Sleeping with Professor Snape was risky, but staying the night with him was even more so. Thankfully, she didn't think anyone noticed she was out of bed. That would warrant a much worse punishment than the one she was currently serving.

Filch sentenced her to clean out one of the many storage closets—without magic. Lucretia had never done a day of real work in her life, having been very spoiled as a child. It might not have been very bad for most, but she found it quite unbearable.

The large closet was filthy, and from the looks of it, hadn't been opened in years. Cobwebs and dust ebbed and flowed in the darkness, covering every surface. In the corner she spied something that appeared to be an iron maiden (or maybe it was just her imagination?); she knew better than to touch it. After dusting the various brooms, torture devices, and spare cauldrons, she came to a large cabinet. She wasn't sure if she had to clean the contents within, but curiosity got the best of her.

For the past few weeks, Wystaer and Sicilia noticed some strange things about their friend. Well, stranger than what was usual for her. She had scratches and scars she couldn't, or wouldn't, explain. She had been serving detentions, and disappearing quickly after eating dinner and lunch, sometimes skipping it entirely.

Tonight was the third time she skipped dinner this week, and her friends noticed.

"Have you seen Luci lately?" Wystaer asked Sicilia after dinner.

"No... do you think she's okay? I'm worried about her." Sicilia stared at her shoes and sighed.

"Maybe she's in some sort of trouble? We should find her and ask her what's going on." Wystaer said, and they went down the halls searching for her.

After a quarter of an hour of searching, they stopped in their tracks when Sicilia heard something, "Do you hear that?"

"Hear what?" Wystaer asked.

"Someone crying..."

"How would you be so sure?"

"I just know so!" Sicilia said, and dragged Wystaer toward the noise. It led them to a door at the end of a dingy hallway. They opened it slowly, and saw Lucretia crying hysterically. Running toward her, they noticed she was kneeling over someone lying on the floor. Professor Snape was dead! But how? Why? Wystaer had to grab Lucretia's shoulders and shake her back to sanity, "What happened?!"

"I don't know! I... j-just found... him when I...opened this c-cabinet...and..." She whimpered out through her sobs into Wystaer's shoulder. "The cabinet..." Sicilia murmured to herself, struggling to piece fragments of reason together. "Riddikulus!" She said, pointing her wand at Snape's cold, lifeless body. To her friends' surprise, in his place appeared a crocodile wearing his clothing. Sicilia tried to shove the large reptile into the cabinet, but he was heavy and refused to budge an inch. "Help me out here!" she yelled. Wystaer got up to push him back in, while Lucretia sat on the floor, rocking back and forth slightly.

Finally managing to slam the doors shut, they tried to coax an explanation out of their friend. "I...don't really want to talk about it," she said, drying her tears with her robes. The cabinet continued to shake as the crocodile flailed about inside. "I have to go," she said, and stood up and left.

She ran through the dark castle corridors, desperate to find him. The true him, not the nightmare illusion. She needed proof he was alive, here, and hers. She needed confirmation, consolation... something _real_.

Her knees felt like they would give way any moment. Clawing through the emptiness, she felt blind, deaf, and dumb. The cold was scorching, the silence was too loud. She ran towards where his office was. _Where is my salvation?_

Suddenly she ran into something solid.

"What's going on here? What are you running about the castle for?" Professor Snape said, clutching the distraught student in his arms.

"I was looking for you," she panted.

"Why?..." he asked. She stood on her toes and leaned in for a kiss, but he pushed her away. "No! Not in the middle of the hall, don't be so foolish!" he snapped, and dragged her back into his classroom.

Tears turned to sighs as kisses turned to caresses. Touches intensified as he traveled south, his adept fingers pushing her closer to the edge of ecstasy.

The door shot open with a loud creak, and a bang as it slammed against the wall.


	15. Love You To Death

After several minutes of searching every room in Hogwarts to find their hysteric and disheveled friend, they had found her—in a place they would least expect—in Professor Snape's dungeon. On a nearby desk she sat, Snape looming over her like some enormous and hideous carrion bird, his hand quite obviously far up her skirt. Even more shocking and bewildering, Lucretia seemed to be enjoying this immensely, that is, until her friends burst in.

"_Fuck! --Was so close... damn them and their concern... wait... SHIT!" _Lucretia thought, now realizing what sobering event had just occured. Wystaer and Sicilia stood in the doorway, their mouths open in shock. "Oh my god!" Sicilia cried, breaking the awkward, tense silence. Lucretia seemed to blush even a deeper scarlet than her lips, and fumbled desperately for the best words to say. "Excuse me while I go kill myself..." Snape mumbled under his breath, removing himself from between her thighs.

Quickly regaining his usual demeanor, he spun around to face the students. "What the bloody hell do you think you're doing here?!" he yelled at them. Sicilia trembled and clutched at Wystaer, who was standing frozen in disbelief. "It's quite disrespectful to enter without knocking first, and isn't it past curfew?" They quivered silently. "...If I'm not mistaken?" No response. "WELL?!" They flinched.

"...Luci? What's going on?" Wystaer asked cautiously. Snape turned to look at Lucretia, his black hair flying in front of his eyes, who bit her lower lip nervously. She hopped down from the desk and straightened her tie, and approached her friends while her professor fumed and silently panicked in the background. "...you shouldn't have come looking for me," Lucretia said, feeling embarrassed.

"What was that? What was he doing?" Sicilia nearly screamed.

"Calm down... Listen, you can't tell _anyone_ about this. Not a soul!" she whispered.

"We have to! Dumbledore will have to know that Snape is hurting you—"

"He isn't hurting me...he... I... we're in love..."

"_WHAT?!_" They both yelled loud enough to wake the dead.

"Just believe me. When have I ever lied to you? Don't answer that. Please, just keep it secret, for all our sakes!"

Attempting to regain his composure and control of the situation, Severus said, "I order you to leave my classroom immediately." Wystaer and Sicilia turned towards the door, while Lucretia was reluctant to move.

"All of you. Out of my sight. NOW."

Tears welled up in Lucretia's eyes as her friends dragged her away. His cold gaze seemed to melt slightly.

Severus lay awake in his bed, gently running his fingers through long black hair, unable to fall asleep once again. He reflected on the evening's events, on the past few months, on his whole life. Even after all the brief moments of victory and power he experienced in his younger years, nothing could compare to what he had tasted in this school term.

He had a real reason to stay in the world. Not just for Dumbledore and the Order, or even just for himself... there was something real; someone. Someone who needed him, wanted him, cared for him. Things he never had before.

"You really shouldn't be here..." he said, his voice slightly muffled by fatigue. "I know, but no one else knows...it can be our little secret." Lucretia said, and kissed him goodnight.


End file.
